Where has the time gone?
I can’t believe how my life has changed these past two weeks.
I clearly haven’t appreciated/utilized my “free” time when I had it. Now I’m struggling to juggle everything I’ve been doing in my life prior to this job. Ya girl is wearing corporate black dresses & walking in heels all day after a dance rehearsal in the last few hours of the day, into the night.
My outlook
Before anyone wants to call me “negative” or not appreciative or say others have been doing this their entire life or if they can do it why can’t you or why do you have complaints. Well because this hasn’t been my reality. Consider a reality when rejection is your best friend (because people can’t be trusted or loyal so you get attached to a feeling instead of a person) because it’s all you know. Job hunting can be a REAL pain and I’m sure most of you know what that can feel like. It has the potential to place you in a dark corner where you sit and view the world’s light. It’s easy to say get out of the darkness from the well lit horse you’re sitting on. What I’m getting at is, before you label, throw shade or comment on someones life put yourself in their position. I truly believe empathy can cure half of our world’s problems.
Who is she
From the girl who has never been short of company or conversation or “friends” to having lunch alone because I refuse to be a slave to the corporate world where I eat lunch from my desk to finish my tasks due or get ahead of them. (I’m guilty, I did it today and once before).
From the girl who got used to living in her fiancés sweat pants, every T-shirt (not the weird coloured ones) and every hoodie because that became comfort and that became “me” to shopping for black corporate dresses and fitted pants during working hours with a kind colleague that endured the pain from those heels that make irritating music on the tiles. Clothing which would now expose my dark knees, dark elbows, skinny ankles either take away any shape from my body or give it too much shape.
Finally, The End.
I don’t know where I’m going with this because I’m truly grateful for this opportunity it’s something I’ve prayed for and thank God for because there are others getting rejected for jobs they wish to have or any job in general to provide for themselves or their families. I guess I just wanted to let people know some empathy towards someone transitioning into a new job or anything new in their life will always be appreciated. Your understanding and support can only encourage and empower them to be more and do more. I’m thankful for this opportunity, it hasn’t been easy but I have a kind of confidence I’ve never had before. My corporate clothing I dreaded now makes me feel like an independent boss woman, those heels that hurt gives me a sense of belonging when it “click clocks” on those marble tiles. I have conquered the feeling of “I can’t, I don’t belong, they won’t choose me” and turned that into owning my position and my space.
I think I might have typed this entire post because I no longer have time or energy to enjoy simple pleasures like binging on YouTube😭. If you got this far thank you for reading atleast now when someone asks me how I am or how the new job is I don’t have to reply with a “I’m good, it’s okay” line. I can just send them this blog post while I transition into this new aspect of my life and not freak out about my wedding coming up in less than three months. (God help me I just realised it’s less than three months).
If you read this I love you and thank you.
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Perhaps you may knead to head on out to Knead on a weekday if you don’t have a few extra minutes to spare, otherwise this is an ideal place to start off your weekend with a scrumptious breakfast. A fast paced environment, sea breezes that are almost at arms reach and the most friendly faces and polite staff.
Sayu x Say me 